Ahhh, June. The month of weddings. I've been thinking about weddings because I like to watch the series, "Big Fat American Gypsy Weddings". Fascinating. Young girls dressing and behaving like skanks, yet taught not to kiss any boy but their husband at around age 16. Cartoonish wedding dresses and much drama. Good times.
My own betrothal began on a camping trip with the family. It was fun staying in the camper, but because it was cold out and I didn't want to go to the facilities across the way in the middle of the night, I decided to pee in a cup. Yes, that is what I did and poured it down the sink then went back to bed. In the morning, I woke to find the Colonel drinking out of said cup. Slightly horrified, I told him what had been in the cup prior to his lips. He wasn't even slightly amused. However, we were still engaged and proceeded to tell the family at the reunion later that day. Celebrate.
Following this theme a bit, on the day of our actual wedding, we dressed in our finery at the then Columbia Tower Club. Slightly nervous and right before the ceremony, I ran into the ladies room and promptly peed on my bustle/train/bow thing that hung off my dress. Fortunately, it was made of chiffon, so I scrubbed it in the sink and tried to wring it out and pat it dry. My dad and uncle were waiting for me so I ran out and said, "I just peed on my train." We have a great picture of all of us coming down the aisle laughing hysterically. My bustle/train/bow thing dried at the altar. Again, good times.
See the common thread? Weddings and all that are just so exciting that one must express themselves.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Pasture Play
It hasn't been that long, but I guess a few people read these ramblings and I don't want to disappoint, no I do not.
The Colonel and I along with the three useless animals are residing in Mazama for the next few weeks. And in case a would-be burglar is reading this, the alarm is on and we rigged poisoned darts to stab you if you approach within three feet of the barn. My hay and grain must be safe, at any cost.
So the little ones arrived and tumbled out of the trailer with bewildered blinking eyes. I led them to their heavenly pasture which confused them even more. They stood looking at each other and walked a few steps and rolled crazily. If they knew how to stick their tongues out at the same time, I'd swear they had rabies. Jump up, eat grass, Lucky jumps all four hooves off the ground and proceeds to rodeo. I was laughing at him, when Trusty, the ever controlled, staid horse, walked up to me and nosed me in the butt, saying, "Are you seeing this? Are you letting him get away with such unbecoming behavior?" Really, you could see it on his face. Since I just stood there, he had to run after him and attempt to bite him into submission. Lucky just ran and kicked some more, so Trusty joined in. It's the first time I've ever seen him gallop.
A couple days of bliss and now they are being hitched up to the carts. DogGus made sure they both knew that he was in charge by barking loudly in their faces and running. He only did that because he knew they couldn't chase him while harnessed. The Colonel was praying that nobody we knew would see him and luckily for me, his hunting buddy that farms next door pulled up and laughed delightedly. Our little dog and pony show continued down the road and we pretended we were in chariots and raced. Of course, Lucky won because once he gets going, there is no stopping. That and I'm lighter than the Colonel so poor Trusty had the weight disadvantage and frankly, barely walking is more his style.
So those are my daily adventures with the boys. They go in the barn at night because the cougars are nearby and a bear tore down our neighbors bird feeder two nights ago. The farmers two Labs came over to investigate and bark at them, but Gus and I scared them off and they are keeping a respectful distance. Plus, I made the Colonel electrify the bottom fence wire.
The Colonel is fishing now and I am going to take the Niece and da 'Phew for rides while DogGus keeps us all in line. This will be a Memorable Weekend.
The Colonel and I along with the three useless animals are residing in Mazama for the next few weeks. And in case a would-be burglar is reading this, the alarm is on and we rigged poisoned darts to stab you if you approach within three feet of the barn. My hay and grain must be safe, at any cost.
So the little ones arrived and tumbled out of the trailer with bewildered blinking eyes. I led them to their heavenly pasture which confused them even more. They stood looking at each other and walked a few steps and rolled crazily. If they knew how to stick their tongues out at the same time, I'd swear they had rabies. Jump up, eat grass, Lucky jumps all four hooves off the ground and proceeds to rodeo. I was laughing at him, when Trusty, the ever controlled, staid horse, walked up to me and nosed me in the butt, saying, "Are you seeing this? Are you letting him get away with such unbecoming behavior?" Really, you could see it on his face. Since I just stood there, he had to run after him and attempt to bite him into submission. Lucky just ran and kicked some more, so Trusty joined in. It's the first time I've ever seen him gallop.
A couple days of bliss and now they are being hitched up to the carts. DogGus made sure they both knew that he was in charge by barking loudly in their faces and running. He only did that because he knew they couldn't chase him while harnessed. The Colonel was praying that nobody we knew would see him and luckily for me, his hunting buddy that farms next door pulled up and laughed delightedly. Our little dog and pony show continued down the road and we pretended we were in chariots and raced. Of course, Lucky won because once he gets going, there is no stopping. That and I'm lighter than the Colonel so poor Trusty had the weight disadvantage and frankly, barely walking is more his style.
So those are my daily adventures with the boys. They go in the barn at night because the cougars are nearby and a bear tore down our neighbors bird feeder two nights ago. The farmers two Labs came over to investigate and bark at them, but Gus and I scared them off and they are keeping a respectful distance. Plus, I made the Colonel electrify the bottom fence wire.
The Colonel is fishing now and I am going to take the Niece and da 'Phew for rides while DogGus keeps us all in line. This will be a Memorable Weekend.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
A Stitch in Time
I will see various doctors this week; my dermatologist for my six month scan, the acupuncturist for my weekly pokes and a new ENT for a scope up the nose. Maybe the Calidora nurse for some major nose Botox, I'm not sure.
At my last fun visit with the derm, I had the baseline full body scan. He of course, offered to burn offending things off or scalp them and I picked and chose those items. One of these weird things was on my toe, on top of a 33 year old bunion scar. It would get red and bumpy and then go away after awhile. It wasn't cancerous and I didn't want the bother of a bandaid and scab to deal with. On this past Saturday, it was back and I touched it and it felt like a hair was stuck. I grabbed a magnifying glass and tweezers and pulled out a quarter inch stitch! Yes- this whole time, an errant piece of nylon was trying to break free! Utterly earth shattering, I'm sure you agree.
It is so very reassuring to know that my body will do what it will to remain healthy, even if it takes a long, long, time.
At my last fun visit with the derm, I had the baseline full body scan. He of course, offered to burn offending things off or scalp them and I picked and chose those items. One of these weird things was on my toe, on top of a 33 year old bunion scar. It would get red and bumpy and then go away after awhile. It wasn't cancerous and I didn't want the bother of a bandaid and scab to deal with. On this past Saturday, it was back and I touched it and it felt like a hair was stuck. I grabbed a magnifying glass and tweezers and pulled out a quarter inch stitch! Yes- this whole time, an errant piece of nylon was trying to break free! Utterly earth shattering, I'm sure you agree.
It is so very reassuring to know that my body will do what it will to remain healthy, even if it takes a long, long, time.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Barn Party
 |
| Trusty |
We hosted a celebration last weekend; the anniversary of my plastic surgery and the acquistion of the little men. It was a Western affair and big fun was had by all.
I stopped by to see the miracle worker, Dr. McIntosh, so that he could bask in his work of art and admire me as I so deserve. I also talked with him about the pain and big bump on my nose. He said that I shouldn't wrinkle my nose when I smile, that would fix it. Very helpful, that man. In seriousness, he said I should shoot several ccs of Botox to reduce the bump and possibly inject lidocaine into my nerve for pain relief. After a bit of debate, he will refer me to a pain management clinic, ENT and I'll try nose Botox from Calidora. Why not him or anyone else? Because I can receive it wholesale due to the Mister's investment there and they'd better be really nice or else.
Dr. Mc also was excited to learn that Trusty and I are volunteering at Camp Korey. He is also volunteering as Medical Support for the Craniofacial Kids during week three or four! He's such a great guy. Isn't it weird how fate/faces brings people together like this?
 |
| Lucky |
So, more shots to the face and such. It's all good.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Happy Anniversary
A year ago today. I'm in Mazama right now, looking at the clouds slowly drift in a bright blue sky. It is an amazing peaceful place, a great place to heal and reflect. Not gonna get all mushy on you, but I am so damn grateful to be where I'm at.
So thank you, Bombay, aka Tango, for showing me that you needed to be in a different life and allowing me to find the little beasties that mean so very much to me. Thank you for allowing me to become a different person, touched by the many kindnesses of my friends and some complete strangers. Thank you for giving me the chance to be a better person with a much better outlook on life. This is life, not a rehearsal and a good kick to the head is what it took to remember.
Update on my career as a Pony Express MJ Delivery Person. I hate it. It makes me feel out of body, anxious and the pain is still there, although I'm so distracted that it doesn't matter much while I'm stoned. Tossed it out. Done. I'm going back to acupuncture and craniosacral therapy and gonna just keep going. I'm also making an appointment with Dr. McIntosh, my wonderful plastic surgeon, just so he can admire his handiwork.
Happy Earth Day. Be happy you have a place on it.
So thank you, Bombay, aka Tango, for showing me that you needed to be in a different life and allowing me to find the little beasties that mean so very much to me. Thank you for allowing me to become a different person, touched by the many kindnesses of my friends and some complete strangers. Thank you for giving me the chance to be a better person with a much better outlook on life. This is life, not a rehearsal and a good kick to the head is what it took to remember.
Update on my career as a Pony Express MJ Delivery Person. I hate it. It makes me feel out of body, anxious and the pain is still there, although I'm so distracted that it doesn't matter much while I'm stoned. Tossed it out. Done. I'm going back to acupuncture and craniosacral therapy and gonna just keep going. I'm also making an appointment with Dr. McIntosh, my wonderful plastic surgeon, just so he can admire his handiwork.
Happy Earth Day. Be happy you have a place on it.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Almost a Year, Let's Buy Some Weed!
Sometimes it feels like yesterday; other times, like today, it feels like forever. I played horseys with my little men and then golfed. This is a normal day, well, except for the face.
Update on the face. I went to the referring weed doctor. It was strange location and somewhat seedy (and weedy- smelling). There were about seven people waiting to be seen and lots of forms to fill out. I brought my medical records, but they wanted a repeat; probably to make sure it was really me. The people around me were a mixed lot. A woman who looked like she needed drugs. An older man dressed up as if it were a job interview and a guy with a back pack that read his Kindle. The doctors seemed professional, kinda casual, but above board (at least wearing ties). The guy I saw had diplomas all over the wall and had graduated with my naturopath. He told me about some different vitamins to try to promote anti inflammation and had a referral to a specialist in trigeminal neuralgia. He said that most patients need two years of documented pain and treatments, but that my allergies to drugs tried would qualify me. Okay.....that part I didn't quite buy, because I've refused to take the typical pain meds, but he said he understood my reluctance to do opiates.
I asked about where I could get the "stuff" and he said he wasn't allowed to discuss it, that somebody else would give me referrals. I return to the waiting room and a new guy calls me in to talk about logistics.
New guy, Brandon, sat me down and said that he had my presciption. Special tamperproof, heat resistant weird paper. Two of them in fact; one to keep with me at all times and one to keep with the weed. He asked if I had minors or guns in the house. I told him I had guns and that I didn't have kids. He asked if I carried a weapon and I told him I did if I was riding alone. He said I need to be sure never to carry my weapon while transporting my medicine and at home, the medicine needed to be kept separate from my weapon. I guess I won't ride a horse when I purchase drugs... That also seems reasonable because I've never kept my gun with my Tylenol. He asked if I understood that I shouldn't sell my medicine to minors. This needs to be asked? I suppose so.
He then told me that there were over 800 dispensararies in the Seattle area with 3-4 opening weekly. So how do I go to a good one, I ask. He very seriously said that if it was in a bad part of town and seemed shady or if the person said they had stuff to get me really high, it probably wasn't an ideal place. Oh, darn. I was gearing up to ride a horse and bring my gun and hope to get some really good stuff to sell to minors. So much for my Pony Express Drug Delivery idea. We did discuss edibles and subliminal tinctures as my form of meds. There is also a topical cream, so that might work, too. I am so hoping that they have the right combo to take the edge off these face twinges.
On a positive note, I received five shots in order to volunteer with Trusty at Camp Korey. My arm hurt like hell for the last few days, but we'll be spreading joys to special kids soon. We're scheduled for seven weeks this summer, twice a week for an hour of general cuteness and joy. I also had a blood draw to be sure I had Mumps and Chicken pox and rule out TB.
I thought it best to do all these tests prior to picking up my new medicine. I will not be selling it to any kids at camp, I can assure you.
Update on the face. I went to the referring weed doctor. It was strange location and somewhat seedy (and weedy- smelling). There were about seven people waiting to be seen and lots of forms to fill out. I brought my medical records, but they wanted a repeat; probably to make sure it was really me. The people around me were a mixed lot. A woman who looked like she needed drugs. An older man dressed up as if it were a job interview and a guy with a back pack that read his Kindle. The doctors seemed professional, kinda casual, but above board (at least wearing ties). The guy I saw had diplomas all over the wall and had graduated with my naturopath. He told me about some different vitamins to try to promote anti inflammation and had a referral to a specialist in trigeminal neuralgia. He said that most patients need two years of documented pain and treatments, but that my allergies to drugs tried would qualify me. Okay.....that part I didn't quite buy, because I've refused to take the typical pain meds, but he said he understood my reluctance to do opiates.
I asked about where I could get the "stuff" and he said he wasn't allowed to discuss it, that somebody else would give me referrals. I return to the waiting room and a new guy calls me in to talk about logistics.
New guy, Brandon, sat me down and said that he had my presciption. Special tamperproof, heat resistant weird paper. Two of them in fact; one to keep with me at all times and one to keep with the weed. He asked if I had minors or guns in the house. I told him I had guns and that I didn't have kids. He asked if I carried a weapon and I told him I did if I was riding alone. He said I need to be sure never to carry my weapon while transporting my medicine and at home, the medicine needed to be kept separate from my weapon. I guess I won't ride a horse when I purchase drugs... That also seems reasonable because I've never kept my gun with my Tylenol. He asked if I understood that I shouldn't sell my medicine to minors. This needs to be asked? I suppose so.
He then told me that there were over 800 dispensararies in the Seattle area with 3-4 opening weekly. So how do I go to a good one, I ask. He very seriously said that if it was in a bad part of town and seemed shady or if the person said they had stuff to get me really high, it probably wasn't an ideal place. Oh, darn. I was gearing up to ride a horse and bring my gun and hope to get some really good stuff to sell to minors. So much for my Pony Express Drug Delivery idea. We did discuss edibles and subliminal tinctures as my form of meds. There is also a topical cream, so that might work, too. I am so hoping that they have the right combo to take the edge off these face twinges.
On a positive note, I received five shots in order to volunteer with Trusty at Camp Korey. My arm hurt like hell for the last few days, but we'll be spreading joys to special kids soon. We're scheduled for seven weeks this summer, twice a week for an hour of general cuteness and joy. I also had a blood draw to be sure I had Mumps and Chicken pox and rule out TB.
I thought it best to do all these tests prior to picking up my new medicine. I will not be selling it to any kids at camp, I can assure you.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
You May Visit Me in Jail
I will accept any and all visitors, yes, I will.
No, I did not kill Trusty's Former Evil Owner. The transaction went well and I got to see Bombay looking very well, playing with his buddy in a pasture. Valentino seemed happy to be home as he nuzzled his little black kitty friend. That's all good.
No, I possibly will be arrested in a sting someday. At least, that is my wild imaginings right now.
The naturopath doctor recommended medical marijuana because I've tried three different drugs, still pain. Pain pills; not an option, nerve calming drugs; not working, acupuncture; not working, but I get a great nap. I'm going to my regular MD this week to get my annual and her opinion. Evidently, it's not a trip to the Gob Shop for a Bong and hope for a dealer on the street, so that is comforting. I don't want to smoke anything, I don't want to feel "high" and I don't want to wig out and get the munchies, either. I also don't want to fail any drug test that prevents me from volunteering with my little man, Trusty. BTW, we are now official Pet Partners, having passed the test yesterday. So, I'm still doing the research...stay tuned....
So that is the dilemma. Yes, I will probably have more friends wanting to "share", but I am looking for the end of all this pain in my face, at least until it is healed.
Here are some Easter shots and our our official Pet Partner badge photo.
No, I did not kill Trusty's Former Evil Owner. The transaction went well and I got to see Bombay looking very well, playing with his buddy in a pasture. Valentino seemed happy to be home as he nuzzled his little black kitty friend. That's all good.
No, I possibly will be arrested in a sting someday. At least, that is my wild imaginings right now.
The naturopath doctor recommended medical marijuana because I've tried three different drugs, still pain. Pain pills; not an option, nerve calming drugs; not working, acupuncture; not working, but I get a great nap. I'm going to my regular MD this week to get my annual and her opinion. Evidently, it's not a trip to the Gob Shop for a Bong and hope for a dealer on the street, so that is comforting. I don't want to smoke anything, I don't want to feel "high" and I don't want to wig out and get the munchies, either. I also don't want to fail any drug test that prevents me from volunteering with my little man, Trusty. BTW, we are now official Pet Partners, having passed the test yesterday. So, I'm still doing the research...stay tuned....
So that is the dilemma. Yes, I will probably have more friends wanting to "share", but I am looking for the end of all this pain in my face, at least until it is healed.
Here are some Easter shots and our our official Pet Partner badge photo.
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